How did you get started? (your work- not masturbation lol)
When I was young and thinking about what I wanted to do for college, I originally went to the idea of sex therapy. I had always been highly sexual, and loved guiding people in their path - it was a no brainer. As I went to school for psychology, I started my sex blog to note down my thoughts and discoveries around sex which kicked off quickly with my Utah audience: It was a TOTAL taboo! I was lucky enough to be linked with a sex toy boutique owner who gave me my first sex toy to review on my blog, and the rest was history.
I now work with multiple brands on the back and front end to promote, review, and create content for their products which has been (orgasmically) rewarding.
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Tips on giving oral? Specifically, on someone with a vagina?
Oral is a delicate art - and the beauty (and intimidation) of it is that every partner is VERY different in what they like! In my blog Good Head: Vagina Edition I cover best practices on giving bomb oral sex to those with vulvas.
The simplest tip? Literally just ask your partner how they like it - I promise, they will tell you exactly what to do.
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What’s some sex advice you would give to your high school self?
Like most of us, a big portion of our “sex education” came from porn - it wasn’t all that bad because it gave me a baseline of creativity of what I could do with my body. What it didn't show me is how to communicate my needs as a woman, and be empowered with it. While I was having great sex, it did make many of my sexual experiences “performative”, and trying to make the experience for my partner fabulous while putting my own needs aside.
I would tell my high school self that it’s safe to communicate my needs, and address them more. If I had learned how to address my needs not only would I be having better sex, but would be a master communicator at a young age.
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I have a hard time separating emotions from sex. Tips or tricks for this?
First off, this is TOTALLY normal - I don’t want you to feel bad for being human and having emotions. While having emotions is beautiful, it can really put a hamper on trying to have fun, casual sex.
My biggest tip is becoming best friends with your intentions. When sleeping with someone new, it’s good to take a good thought (even if it’s just a few minutes) to set intentions on your experience with them. There’s a big shift in telling yourself “This is simply a fun, casual experience with no strings attached” and going forth with a clear mind. Also think, what would make you feel safe and secure in this experience with no emotions involved? Would that be getting reassurance from this person? Friendship? Support? Communication?
If that clarity isn’t so easy, talk it over with the person. You can set boundaries and talk about what to do if emotions do come up, which is very normal. For example, have a game plan: If feelings come up, we need to sit down and talk + take a break from sex until we figure this out together.
I’ve been interested in a thruster for a while. Best one start for intro?
I always always always recommend Thruster’s Mini Teddy as a intro thrusting toy so you can get the feel and rhythm of using such an innovative (and powerful AF) machine. It’s very conducive in the sense that it’s a realistic length, size, and has incredible flexibility (plus being very easy to travel with). Start with this, and work your way up in length and size from there.
